


Everyone can say it

by torres



Category: Football RPF
Genre: M/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2013-10-22
Updated: 2013-10-22
Packaged: 2017-12-30 05:04:04
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 568
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/1014421
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/torres/pseuds/torres
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>A dialogue-only story, where the Liverpool players try to get Daniel to admit his feelings for a certain Spaniard.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Everyone can say it

“Daniel, do you think Fernando is hot?”

“I’m not answering that question.”

“Oh, come on. No malice.”

“Knowing you, Pepe, it has nothing _but_ malice.”

“Shut up, Fernando, I was talking to Daniel.”

“Excuse me, I am just as much a victim here.”

“Hush-a-bye, pretty boy. And you, Daniel, any chance you can give us a yes or no answer any time soon?”

“...”

“I dunno why it’s so difficult, Agger. I mean, anyone can say, ‘I think Fernando Torres is a hot man.’ Look. Dirk?”

“I think Fernando Torres is a hot man.”

“See? Easy. Maxi?”

“I think Fernando Torres is a hot man.”

“Good. Carra?”

“I think Fernando Torres is hot.”

“Thanks, Carra, but that’s just wrong.”

“Stevie?”

“I think Nando’s so hot, I would fuck that ass.”

“Okay, Stevie, a little too much insight. Lucas?”

“I think Fernando is hot.”

“See? Now Daniel, your turn.”

“Jesus Christ. Fine. I think – ”

“Wait, wait! Fernando, sit here beside Dan.”

“What? No!”

“Just do it, Torres.”

“Fine.”

“Okay, now, hand on hip, please.”

“What?”

“JUST DO IT. ...Bloody hell, Nando, _not you_. Why would I want you to put your hands on your hips? I meant, _Daniel’s hand, Fernando’s hip_.”

“Fuck right I’m gonna do that!”

“Seriously, what the fuck, Pepe?”

“GET TO IT!”

“You want this prank to finish or not?”

“Okay, okay! Jeez!”

“Well?”

“Can you just wait?! ... Nando, is it okay if I...”

“Uh. Yeah, sure.”

“AWWWWWW.”

“Sheesh, Lucas, nothing’s happened yet.”

“I said hand to hip, Dan. Not ribcage.”

“Come on, Pepe.”

“I said, lower!”

“What? This is low already! All kinds of low, actually.”

“GODDAMMIT, I said lower! What is ‘lower’ in Danish?”

“FINE. There! Happy?”

“Well, I think Fernando’s happy.”

“Wow, thanks, Stevie.”

“Now, now, boys, let’s not lose track of what’s happening here. Daniel, what are you supposed to say?”

“I think – ”

“Wait! Fernando, look into his eyes.”

“Pepe! Where do you even come up with this stuff?”

“SHUT IT, PRETTY BOY! Daniel is about to tell you something important SO LOOK INTO HIS EYES.”

“Bloody hell, fine! Let’s just get this over with.”

“Now, Daniel?”

“I think Fernando Torres is – ”

“Oh, you can address him directly.”

“Uh. Okay. Um. Fernando...”

“EEEEEEEEEEEEKKKKKKKKK.”

“For crying out loud, Lucas, at least wait until Agger’s finished saying it!”

“Sorry, Carra.”

“Go on, Daniel.”

“Uh, Nando, I think you’re a... ah – ”

“AAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHH.”

“LUCAS!”

“I’m sorry, I can’t help it!”

“Fernando, Ithinkyou’rereallyhot.”

“AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!”

“Oh, damn, look at how red Fernando’s cheeks are. Fernando, your cheeks are so red.”

“I can see a smile, Daniel. I can see it!”

“I am not smiling!”

“Wow, now you’re really red, Nando. You were only ever either pale or um, really pale.”

“I am not red.”

“Oh, come on. Just say it.”

“I am not!”

“Jesus, it’s so easy to say it. ‘Daniel Agger makes me blush.’ Give it a try.”

“No.”

“But _everyone can say it_! Dirk?”

“Daniel Agger makes me blush.”

“THIS TRICK IS NOT GONNA WORK AGAIN!”

“Carra!”

“Daniel Agger makes me blush.”

“Stevie!”

“Daniel Agger makes me blush so much, I want to – ”

“Okay, that’s enough. Maxi!”

“Daniel Agger makes me – ”

“I am leaving.”

“Me too.”

“Wait, so are you guys leaving... _together_?”

“NO!”

“Let’s try this again. Dirk!”

“I am leaving with Daniel Agger so he can fuck me in his car.”

“Good one, Dirk. Marvellous. Now, Carra! And Stevie! Lucas! And Maxi! All together now!”


End file.
